the ramble dump
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Press Release
So here am I, the shameless showman of the Fat Man In Tweed circus, announcing that the approximate third of 2006 remaining will be the most spectacular, most epic and most shocking yet witnessed by the two or three people who visit this website.
I'm excited. But then, it's a great excuse not to do any work.
But seriously. Dudes. Dudes. Get some loud and dramatic music of your choice playing, because lots of pretty major stuff is going to be happening. And at the end of December, 2006 will end like 2006 has never ended before. Just you wait.
So we should really kick things off. And to do so: a shiny new story.
On May 20th, a strange message appeared on the Fat Man In Tweed mainpage. Those with great astuteness and several nudgings in the right direction stumbled across this, a curious, ambiguous entry filled with clues to... something.
A month later a poster appeared, which was met with universal dumbfoundment.
Now let ye riddles be solved.
May I reintroduce to you: Jesnails.
Brought to you in a stylishly last-minute sort of way. Unfortunately, due to an unaccountable malfunction in time, only the prologue is going up tonight, but the first proper installment will be online very shortly (in two parts, because it's quite a bit bigger than we anticipated). We still met our deadline!
For those interested in a little bit of background, Jesnails first appeared at the end of 2005 as the result of some of the many bizarre conversations I have with friend Ella Turnbull. These led to Jesnails Returns, a Christmas story in which a strange, pseudomessianic figure appears, an individual with big hair and a passion for disco who is seen as a threat to the uncomfortable and rather inert dictatorship that currently has the somewhat indifferent population of the world in its grasp. Chaos ensues, with mercenary fake Santas, televangelists, drunken babies, psychotic judges, shotguns in teapots and lots and lots of beans all heading full-force into an explosive finale.
Jesnails made a surprise reappearance in April, in the last boardfic I did, SciBoard Resurrection, called on by the ultimately treacherous Mayor Electric to deal with the city's zombie infestation. A good portion of the city is destroyed towards the end when a giant stage and huge loudspeakers rise up from the ground and demolish the surrounding area, as Jesnails attempts to purge the city of its undead through the power of disco. She later inadvertently discovers the zombie's lair, in which her afrolights provide light for the others, and helps defeat the archzombie Zomborr by throwing a crucifix at him and knocking him off his high platform. Shortly after, she disappears.
And now she's back again, this time having earned the prestigious honour of being a main Fat Man In Tweed feature. This should probably be considered independant of her previous appearances, as her previous appearances were of each other, mostly for the sake of your own sanity.
But just what would happen if Jesnails was in possession of a time machine? We shall show you! Oh verily yes, we shall.
P.S. City of Anarchy will return in 2007.
I'm excited. But then, it's a great excuse not to do any work.
But seriously. Dudes. Dudes. Get some loud and dramatic music of your choice playing, because lots of pretty major stuff is going to be happening. And at the end of December, 2006 will end like 2006 has never ended before. Just you wait.
So we should really kick things off. And to do so: a shiny new story.
On May 20th, a strange message appeared on the Fat Man In Tweed mainpage. Those with great astuteness and several nudgings in the right direction stumbled across this, a curious, ambiguous entry filled with clues to... something.
A month later a poster appeared, which was met with universal dumbfoundment.
Now let ye riddles be solved.
May I reintroduce to you: Jesnails.
Brought to you in a stylishly last-minute sort of way. Unfortunately, due to an unaccountable malfunction in time, only the prologue is going up tonight, but the first proper installment will be online very shortly (in two parts, because it's quite a bit bigger than we anticipated). We still met our deadline!
For those interested in a little bit of background, Jesnails first appeared at the end of 2005 as the result of some of the many bizarre conversations I have with friend Ella Turnbull. These led to Jesnails Returns, a Christmas story in which a strange, pseudomessianic figure appears, an individual with big hair and a passion for disco who is seen as a threat to the uncomfortable and rather inert dictatorship that currently has the somewhat indifferent population of the world in its grasp. Chaos ensues, with mercenary fake Santas, televangelists, drunken babies, psychotic judges, shotguns in teapots and lots and lots of beans all heading full-force into an explosive finale.
Jesnails made a surprise reappearance in April, in the last boardfic I did, SciBoard Resurrection, called on by the ultimately treacherous Mayor Electric to deal with the city's zombie infestation. A good portion of the city is destroyed towards the end when a giant stage and huge loudspeakers rise up from the ground and demolish the surrounding area, as Jesnails attempts to purge the city of its undead through the power of disco. She later inadvertently discovers the zombie's lair, in which her afrolights provide light for the others, and helps defeat the archzombie Zomborr by throwing a crucifix at him and knocking him off his high platform. Shortly after, she disappears.
And now she's back again, this time having earned the prestigious honour of being a main Fat Man In Tweed feature. This should probably be considered independant of her previous appearances, as her previous appearances were of each other, mostly for the sake of your own sanity.
But just what would happen if Jesnails was in possession of a time machine? We shall show you! Oh verily yes, we shall.
P.S. City of Anarchy will return in 2007.
Labels: boardfic, city of anarchy, jesnails
